Heart of Barkness by Spencer Quinn
Author:Spencer Quinn
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Tom Doherty Associates
Seventeen
“Here’s a theory,” Bernie said, as we headed out of town, roof down and the wind in our hair. “Clint beat up Jordan after the C-note incident. Can’t see Clint as much of a fistfighter, but Jordan’s probably worse. Maybe Clint took him by surprise. And after, what if Jordan snapped? Or Rita convinced him that any man with a backbone should snap after that kind of provocation? So Jordan goes over to Lotty’s ranch to settle the score. Rita goes with him to make sure it gets settled. Things get out of hand and the knife comes out of the drawer. And now Lotty’s taking the fall for her grandson. It’s like a distant cousin of ‘Long Black Veil,’ or some other murder ballad.”
Bernie’s always the smartest human in the room. There shouldn’t be any disagreement on that by now. But sometimes he soars up to such a high level that he’s like a super Bernie. I went over what I’d just heard: backbone, knife, murder. It made total sense. Any moment now I’d be grabbing a perp by the pant leg and then we’d be celebrating at the Dry Gulch Steakhouse and Saloon, where I had many friends among the waitstaff. I gazed at the face of super Bernie. Super Bernie looked just like my Bernie, meaning you’d never guess the brainpower just humming away inside. Sitting there beside him, I listened for that hum, but heard nothing, surely on account of all the highway noise.
He glanced over and smiled. “Your mind on Kobe beef and truffle oil?”
Most certainly not! And then it was! Stuck on Kobe beef and truffle oil and nothing but. And suddenly I made an astonishing mental leap: we needed a robot of our own! Did you go somewhere to buy robots? Or did you just meet them in a bar and get friendly? Either sounded fine to me. I barked a bark that meant Let’s get cracking on this!
Bernie laughed and said, “I knew it.”
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Dark Humor | Humorous |
Satire |
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